Sex Matters

Q: Dear Dr. Darcy:

My boyfriend doesn’t have sex with me…he stopped after 6 months.  We’ve now been together for over a year and I’m starting to go crazy. He tells me he’s just not very sexual and that most couples don’t have sex after a while.  My guy friends tell me he’s definitely cheating on me – that men don’t go without sex normally. I’m not sure what to do. I’m tempted to look in his phone to see what the hell is going on.  I find myself picking on him endlessly. Maybe it’s just time to end the relationship. How important is sex to a relationship?

Click below to read my answer!

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Bitch Less. Smile More: The Ratio That Will Save Your Relationship

No one likes a Negative Nathan. It’s true. Humans universally gravitate towards positive, happy people – and we are put off by pessimism… unless that pessimism is delivered in a very dry, witty, dark-humored way, which very few people pull off (my niece being among the few exceptions). But I digress.

If your conversations with your partner rarely put a smile on his/her face, you’re probably pushing the limit of the ideal bitch-to-smile ratio. Yes, I’ve quantified it. Click below to read the bitch-to-smile ratio.

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Do not read if you want to believe in fairy tales

If you want a long-term relationship to last, you have to change the grammatical association
you have with the word Love. I have a very rational explanation for this:

Emotions come and go. They ebb and flow. They aren’t consistent. The reason people fail to create new long-term habits boils down to this: They rely on motivation to propel them to take consistent action.

Click below to read how a small change in the way you view Love can make a big difference.

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100%- 0% Principle

Q:
Dear Dr. Darcy:
Ever since my boyfriend and I decided to move in together, our relationship has been suffering.  Actually, I have been suffering. He’s a closeted pig. A slob. He doesn’t pick up after himself and there’s no methodology around how housework gets done. As a result, I do everything. I have turned into the proverbial nag and I hate what I sound like.  How do couples negotiate housework? He tells me he’s going to do things like clean the bathroom or put the dishes in the dishwasher and he never follows through. Every time I walk into the apartment I’m hit in the face with evidence that he hasn’t done what he’s promised me he’d do.  It’s really affecting my ability to trust him and I’m starting to think there’s no hope. How did I find the one gay man who is a slob?

Click below to read my answer!

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Was it Consent or Did She Relent?

If you’re a woman who’s spent any time dating men, you’ve been there. The fact that you may never have spoken about it is probably a combined result of how often it’s happened to you and how sexually nuanced the experience is.

 I’ve heard of it happening to women who are in committed relationships, I’ve heard it described by women who barely knew the guy, and I’ve heard too many scenarios in between.

 It’s that moment when you’re being asked to have sex, and you say no, but instead of hearing your ‘no’ as a NO, he dials up his seduction…

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